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The Spiritual Side of ED Recovery

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hunger and clothes [Dec. 3rd, 2008|05:54 pm]
The Spiritual Side of ED Recovery


My sense of hunger is so totally off. I guess I unlearned how to feel hunger, and apparently this is common with eating disorders. I still get confused and will not realize that I'm hungry until my blood sugar drops and I'm dizzy and ill. I'm not entirely sure how to get my hunger back, so for now I'm eating small amounts of food to see if that triggers enough hunger to justify eating a whole meal. It seems to be working. Having a handful of nuts or a pita with hummus or a piece of fruit seems to be enough to stimulate my hunger. I've also been going to acupuncture for loss of appetite, and the herbs they gave me seem to be helping.

I bought a pair of pants yesterday and it was a totally surreal experience. I guess my body image is still pretty distorted because I have such a hard time figuring out if things fit right. It's a good thing that spandex is in style because I know that fits right. I needed some nice modest pants for work that weren't too tight, showing off my ass. I had no clue what size I might wear so I grabbed one size larger than I thought I would need. That didn't fit, so I just grabbed a size smaller and bought it because I didn't have time to try stuff on again. They fit fine around my waist, and they're not baggy. I just keep telling myself that because I think I look funny in them. My weight still fluxuates so I have a bunch of pants that don't fit properly, and that's the look that I'm used to.

These little things make all the difference.